False Apology

 This Is Just To Say

I have eaten
the plums
that were in
the icebox

 

and which
you were probably
saving
for breakfast

 

Forgive me
they were delicious
so sweet
and so cold

 

Williams Carlos Williams

 

 Parodies
by grade eight students

 

This Is Just To Say

You got sick
after you ate
the cookie
I set for you

 

which I baked
after sprinkling
poison
in the pastry

 

Forgive me Alice
enough is enough
stop stalking
me

Isabel, Tamika, Seleah

 

 

This Is Just To Say

I have eaten
the porridge
that was on
the table

 

and which
you were probably
saving for
lunch

 

Forgive me
it was so tasteful
so delightful
and so perfect

Kalem, Damen, Luke

 

 

This Is Just To Say

I have taken
your pencil
that you own
and care for

 

which you probably
were going to use
tomorrow
after school

 

Forgive me
it’s so easy
to fool someone
so trusting

Marcus, Gregory

 

This Is Just To Say

Dear Miss Wilhelmina Swine,

I hope you and your family are fine
after the passing of your sons.
Tragic, how their lives came undone.

The construction left them quite dead.
I sure wish it hadn’t fallen on their heads,
but at least your third little piggy is still alive.
I really hope he continues to thrive.

I am so very sorry for your loss,
for undoubtedly you must be very cross.
But oh, how I love pork chops so fine.
Scrumptious! Their meat is sublime.

Dylan

 

This Is Just To Say

I slept in
this morning
and pressed the
snooze button one too many times

 

so that
is why
I missed
your English class

 

Forgive me
my extra sleep
was very
dreamy

Colin, Tim

Read more poems of false apology in…
Picture 3
Levine, Gail Carson. Forgive Me, I Meant to Do It. New York: Harper, 2012.
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